O, Holy Night

I think spanking should be considered a religion. It has as much ritual as any traditional cult, and, like Christianity, it heavily relies on sin, guilt, confession, penance, forgiveness, redemption

To celebrate the season, here is some religious art, followed by some religious hymns.

Go Tell it on the Mountain

You'll yell, and start to poutin'

Over the knee, no underwear.

You'll yell, there is no doubtin'

"Jesus Christ," you'll swear!

While siblings are a watching

Through bedroom door ajar

He'll hold you 'round your hips, girl,

And spank till you see stars.

You'll yell, and start to poutin'

Over the knee, no underwear.

You'll yell, there is no doubtin' --

"Jesus Christ," you'll swear!

(Good King Wenceslas)

Spanking Wendy's ass all day

Should be a treat for Stephen.

But she seemed bored and far away

The girl was not a grievin.'

Bright and red her moons that night

From a paddling cruel;

When a poor man saw the sight,

Stephen said, "You, too, will

Spank the girl; she'll call you, "Sir"

Her grieving will be built-in.

Make believe it isn't her

Instead, it's Paris Hilton!

"She was most unrepenting

For making fun of aunty

Wendy needs an upending

And taking down of panties."

The hungry man gave twenty licks

With strength of sudden virulence

Her tears and squirms and ankle kicks

Were born of much experience.

Each played the part up to the hilt

Master, beggar, bad girl

The poor man lifted up her kilt ‑‑

Gained treasures of the world.

In her master's steps she trod

On the carpet deep‑piled

To bed chamber of her lord,

"You no more will weep, child."

The lesson we should learn, fer sure

'Bout giving and a thanking:

Ye who bottom for the poor

Shall get the richest spanking.

               

 

 ("Nowell")

No‑o‑o sir, no‑o‑o sir,

My angel did say

Tears rolling free and her pants down halfway

I‑i‑n shame did she cry

When each lick echoed "WHAP"

And she tightened her cheeks in advance of the strap.

No‑o‑o sir, no‑o‑o sir,

No‑o‑o sir, no‑o‑o sir,

From now on I promise to be a good girl.

 ("Let it Snow")

Your behavior this year was frightful

So your butt will be a sightful

And since you've no place to go

Let it show, let it show, let it show

You displayed no signs of stopping

So the paddle will do some popping

Your pants are pulled down low

Let it show, let it show, let it show

When you finally say goodnight

And your attitude does reform

And you decide that you won't fight

All the way home you'll be warm

The fire is slowly drying

And my dear you still are crying

But as long as you love me so

Let it show, let it show, let it show

(“I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" - very dated but possibly still funny)

I saw Mommy spanking Doctor Ross

After she watched ER last night.

She seemed a bit loony

As she spanked a phantom Clooney

She fantasized a fuck

While her eyes were glazed and moony.

Then, I saw Mommy tickle Doctor Ross

Underneath his scrubs so green and tight

She led him gently ghostly bedward

And then saw 'twas Anthony Edwards

Mommy spanked 'stead of Doctor Ross that night.

The Carol of Gloria Schlepper

("Angels We Have Heard on High")

Ankles where the panties hang

Dangling over white socks plain

And her bottom bouncing high

Echoing the plaintive cry:

Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria,

"'Twas excessive mayo."

Schleppers eat their corned beef dry

With some mustard on the rye

What their daughter did, insane,

Caused her to hear Dad complain:

Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria,

"'Twas excessive mayo."

Come to Beth and Sam's Deli

Where the sandwich right, you'll see.

No more bread you'll buy that's white

Or your tushie's red and bright.

Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria,

"'Twas excessive mayo."

Why are you a stranger, girl,

To the kosher style world?

Him whose birth the others praise

Leads to gobs of mayonnaise.

Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria,

"'Twas excessive mayo."